I think that the following quote sums up my time here at Miami. "To think that in such a place, I led such a life." It gives perfect closure to this wonderful experience in this wonderful place. To quote Friends, "It's the end of an era". I am moving on to new experiences, and will undergo a lot of change this summer. It was a wonderful time and I will miss it so much, but I need to stay positive and be excited for this new era. It is an era of starting my life with Brent, of getting a real job or going to more school to get a job, moving to a new state, making new friends, choosing a new church, and becoming a grown-up. These are all exciting things! For the first time, I am looking forward to all of these changes, and am excited to make my own life! While I have made my own identity and lifestyle here at Miami, I will continue to learn about myself after graduating. I can't wait to see what this summer and rest of the year will bring!
One of the major sins that I have been working on overcoming is worry. I have a lot of things in my life right now that I could be worrying about. I could worry about gaining admission to graduate school this fall, I could worry about my wedding, moving to Michigan and not knowing anyone but Brent, adjusting to my move while Brent works long hours this summer and travels to China for a month without me, and about what I am going to do for my career for the rest of my life. I have decided to give my worries to God and let him handle them. I trust that whatever happens in my life is in His plan. I think that this time in which I am waiting on grad school has taught me a lot. I have learned not to place my identity in my intelligence or my accomplishments. I have also learned to be a positive example for others who are struggling with worry about their futures. If I have to be that example of the person who has a positive outlook on not getting into grad school right away, I will do it. I will trust that it is in His plan and that it is best for me. I may not know now, and I may never realize it, but I will not worry about what I cannot control.
I have also gained more motivation and passion for my career since it is not coming as easily as I had expected. I thought that everything would be easy and that I'd move on to grad school because that is what I have to do. It's the next step in my career. What I am realizing now is that I can do anything I want, and that I do not have to follow any set plan. I can enjoy this time off to learn more about myself or to pursue other interests. I can think more about what I want to do with speech-language pathology. Since this road hasn't been what I expected, it has given me more appreciation for my education. I want to make the most of it and really try my best to utilize everything that graduate school offers. I have time now to get prepared and to re-focus my mind for this new stage.
In the meantime, I am going to evaluate myself and my interests and think about how I would like my life to look in the future, and how I want to spend my days. I have the opportunity to think about all of my options. There are so many paths in life, and I can make my own. I am just now realizing that the world has endless options, and I have the chance now to re-evaluate what I want to do. Although I still want to pursue speech-language pathology and attending graduate school, I have time to think about what I can do in between, after, and maybe on my own time while I am in my career. I am excited at the prospect of not knowing what I will be doing in four months! I do not know where life is going to take me, but I am confident that God has it under control, and that I will be happy!
This next week will be full of lasts, and I will soak up every moment! Thank you to everyone who made my college experience special! I am so excited for all of our futures!
